Wishing for Home in Lebanon (wherever mag)

I was solicited by wherever mag to write a piece for their web publication addressing my experience with place and Lebanon. I agreed. This piece is for everyone who knows how difficult it is to exist in the between spaces, and for those who have yet to find out. You will find an excerpt of and link to my published piece, Wishing for Home in Lebanon, below.


“This visit to Lebanon was my second. The summer before, I had travelled with my parents. My father, returned to his native country, served as a buffer between me and the half of my culture I did not grow up in. We stayed one month. But this visit in 2002 was different; I arrived as an adult, husband in tow. I made a study of my aunt’s cooking. I made the appropriate social calls to friends and relatives, despite my inability to hold much conversation other than niceties. I even managed to make and serve Arabic coffee to guests—an act by which hosts and hostesses are judged, and one which established my status as a Lebanese woman despite my lack of language skills. It was difficult, this cultural immersion. But there was a heavier sickness that plagued me: longing.”

Find the complete story on the wherever mag website by clicking below:

Wishing for Home in Lebanon

Shawna Ayoub

Shawna Ayoub is an essayist, fiction writer, poet and instructor with an MFA in creative writing from Indiana University. Some of her work has been published in The Manifest-Station, Role Reboot, [wherever], The Huffington Post, The Oxford Review and Exit 7. Her writing explores the intersections of race, place and survivorship. She writes with honesty about her own experience in order to transform pain.

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