I can point you to another writer working through this …

Comment on Read “Anxious All Over” on Stigma Fighters by Shawna Ayoub Ainslie.

I can point you to another writer working through this as well. It’s as cathartic as it is frightening, but I believe it is necessary.

“I know toddlers do these things. I’m not suggesting my toddler is being abusive toward me, even if his hitting me reminded me of having been abused. I’m saying that having to grab his hand, lean in very close, and raise my voice to say, “WE DO NOT HIT EVER. NO HITTING!” is a little traumatizing for me. I’m saying that when he screams in anger and I calmly and softly repeat, “There’s no need to yell. Use your words. Use your quiet voice. We only yell outside. No yelling in the house,” it feels too much like pleading with someone to stop directing their rage at me, to listen to reason, to please let me walk away. And you usually can’t walk away from your toddler.”

This is from Stacia Fleegal, and you can find the full piece here: https://singlewritingmom.wordpress.com/2015/10/01/disciplining-my-toddler-might-be-triggering-me/comment-page-1/#comment-234

If you do decide to write on this, I’d like to point you to my safe writing practice tools and prompts. Connecting with our triggers and their roots can be . . . triggering. http://honeyquill.com/2015/08/17/free-resources-for-creating-a-writing-practice-for-self-care/

Shawna Ayoub Ainslie Also Commented

Read “Anxious All Over” on Stigma Fighters
Thank you, Janice! I will check this out. 🙂 Hope you find some takers. It seems like a great offering.

Read “Anxious All Over” on Stigma Fighters
YES! I was told that. I even told people that. It’s a horrible practice to assume faith has anything to do with trauma, our processing of it, or mental illness. I’m so sorry you have been isolated that way. Thank you for mentioning this here.

Recent Comments by Shawna Ayoub Ainslie

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Kelly, I am so glad we found each other again. I remember you from last time. Can we connect on FB?

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Thank you, Elaine. I did a lot of crying in front of and with them once school was out. They weren’t sure how to feel, so seeing my sadness helped. You are right about the sharing of grief. I’m glad I stayed open.

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Thank you. <3

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Yes, very true. We need to be able to share.

I am so glad you love the parenting. It is very unnatural to me; a constant battle to be kind. Even now I am struggling not to be angry about crumbs and drips and kids who refuse to listen the first or second or third time.

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I think, here, there have been longer stretches in between the beautiful moments despite my constant reframing. The kids are pushing boundaries, I have been dealing with some background noise, and there is the running to and fro. Mama, we need a break.


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